dependency

I was talking with this guy (a guy!!) at a party, and we were watching my and some other kids running around, and out comes the perfunctory small talk re: kids--Oh if only we had that much energy!--as if an invisible hand is somehow forcing us to stand in place, not allowing us to put down our beers, forbidding our feet to move. Ahh, adulthood.

So he says something like, how do kids have so much energy? and I respond, you know, I wonder when we lose this. And he replies, college, maybe? Which says a lot about a person, probably. My chronic ennui set in around high school, so this guy clearly does not have as many issues as I do. Naturally, I pretend, that for me too, I lost my endless energy in college. So what is it about college, then, I ask, and he answers, I don't know, you start drinking alcohol, needing coffee in the morning. He trails off. That's it! I say, It's chemical dependence, and he laughs, because we have just solved the universe.

I'm thinking about this, because I'm at the dentist, waiting for L in the waiting room, and I had this thought that if I was a millionaire, or an entrepreneur, or you know, had any more energy or motivation, I would totally start a chain of coffee carst that followed around bedraggled parents and adults. I would park right outside daycares, elementary schools, outside the waiting rooms of dentists and doctors.

And then I realized that I have an unhealthy chemical dependence caffeine and I should probably do something about that.  Like, eventually. Sometime. Maybe.

Lena's new morning routine. She says, "I like watching birds with Antigone."